Turbonegro - "A Dazzling Display of Talent"
Oh my what a dazzling display
Oh my what a dazzling display
Of talent that's what they say
Would you believe it
My goodness HEY
Take a look around
I'm so impressed
Of everything they do
Do it again and again alright
I can't believe my eyes
It's unbelievable
In the middle of the show
They make the fluids flow
Take it away
Du geile Sau
Oh my what a dazzling display
Oh my what a dazzling display
Of assholes that's what I say
Would you believe it
My goodness HEY
Look around
Oh so impressed
Of all the things they do
Do it again and again alright
I can't believe my eyes
It's unbelievable
Give me what I know
Make the fluids flow
That's what I know
Come on, let's go
And make the fluids flow
Can you smell it ?
It's stinking yellow
Oi Oi Oi
I'm so impressed ... TALENT!
Sunday, February 27, 2005
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
CASH MONEY
Got my Oklahoma state income tax rebate back today. Look at it and weep, bitches:
Yeah, that four whole dollars, you poor bastards. American dollars. I am now officially Rick James, bitch.
Yeah, that four whole dollars, you poor bastards. American dollars. I am now officially Rick James, bitch.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
SIZZLE OF THE DIZZLE (song of the day, whitey)
Dick Delicious and the Tasty Testicles - "Masturbating for a Brighter Tomorrow"
What do you do if you want to prevent a rape?
You go down to the store, you rent yourself a porno tape
What do you do if you want to prevent AIDS?
You whack upon your dick, you smack upon your ding-a-long
Till it needs Band-Aids
And you'll be masturbating for a brighter tomorrow
and it will free the world from disease and sorrow
as long as you've got your dick in your hand
you've got your best friend (oh oh)
And you'll always know who will be there in the end
What do you do if you want to stop HIV?
You leave the whore at the bar, and whack your way to safety
And what do you do, if you don't want to knock that ho up?
(C'mon you guys, i know you know this one)
And how do you keep from waking up
Next to some ugly slut?
And you'll be masturbating for a brighter tomorrow
and it will free the world from disease and sorrow
as long as you've got your dick in your hand
you've got your best friend (oh oh)
And you'll always know who will be there in the end
I sit eating tacos some times
Thinking it all might end (oh no)
As long as you've got your gland in your hand
You've got your best friend
What do you do if you want to prevent a rape?
You go down to the store, you rent yourself a porno tape
What do you do if you want to prevent AIDS?
You whack upon your dick, you smack upon your ding-a-long
Till it needs Band-Aids
And you'll be masturbating for a brighter tomorrow
and it will free the world from disease and sorrow
as long as you've got your dick in your hand
you've got your best friend (oh oh)
And you'll always know who will be there in the end
What do you do if you want to stop HIV?
You leave the whore at the bar, and whack your way to safety
And what do you do, if you don't want to knock that ho up?
(C'mon you guys, i know you know this one)
And how do you keep from waking up
Next to some ugly slut?
And you'll be masturbating for a brighter tomorrow
and it will free the world from disease and sorrow
as long as you've got your dick in your hand
you've got your best friend (oh oh)
And you'll always know who will be there in the end
I sit eating tacos some times
Thinking it all might end (oh no)
As long as you've got your gland in your hand
You've got your best friend
Back on Track
Slowly but surely, things are getting back to some version of normal. After four months of non-payment while I was living with hell-roommate, I finally had enough excess dough to pay $160-something in past-due student loans. And after Thursday, I can plop down the same amount and finally get caught up. So instead of blowing all my money supporting a burned-out fake lesbian, now, I'm blowing all my money paying for a year at Ole Miss in 1998, where I learned absolutely nothing that I can recall at this time.
Good times.
Good times.
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
THY INFERNAL SONG OF THE DAY
Jerry Reed - "Amos Moses"
Well Amos Moses was a Cajun,
He lived by himself in the swamp.
He hunted alligators for a livin,
He just knocked 'em in the head with a stump.
The Louisiana law gonna get ya Amos
It ain't legal hunting alligators down in the swamp, boy
Well everybody blames his old man,
For makin' him mean as a snake,
When Amos Moses was a boy
His daddy would use him for alligator bait.
Tie a rope around his neck, and throw him in the swamp,
Alligator bit him in a Louisiana bayou
About 45 minutes southeast of Thibodeaux, Louisiana
Lived a man named Doc Milsap and his pretty wife Hanna
They raised up a son who could eat up his weight in groceries,
Named him after a man of the cloth,
Called him Amos Moses
Well, the folks around south Louisiana
Said Amos was a hell of a man
He could trap the biggest, the meanest alligator
And just use one hand
That's all he's got left cause an alligator bit him
Left arm gone clean up to the elbow
Well the sheriff caught wind that Amos
Was in the swamp huntin' alligator skins
So he snuck in the swamp, gonna getcha boy,
But he never come out again.
Well, I wonder where the Louisiana sheriff went to?
You can sure get lost in a Louisiana bayou!
About 45 minutes southeast of Thibodeaux, Louisiana
Lived a man named Doc Milsap and his pretty wife Hanna
They raised a son who could eat up his weight in groceries,
Named him after a man of the cloth,
Called him Amos Moses
Well Amos Moses was a Cajun,
He lived by himself in the swamp.
He hunted alligators for a livin,
He just knocked 'em in the head with a stump.
The Louisiana law gonna get ya Amos
It ain't legal hunting alligators down in the swamp, boy
Well everybody blames his old man,
For makin' him mean as a snake,
When Amos Moses was a boy
His daddy would use him for alligator bait.
Tie a rope around his neck, and throw him in the swamp,
Alligator bit him in a Louisiana bayou
About 45 minutes southeast of Thibodeaux, Louisiana
Lived a man named Doc Milsap and his pretty wife Hanna
They raised up a son who could eat up his weight in groceries,
Named him after a man of the cloth,
Called him Amos Moses
Well, the folks around south Louisiana
Said Amos was a hell of a man
He could trap the biggest, the meanest alligator
And just use one hand
That's all he's got left cause an alligator bit him
Left arm gone clean up to the elbow
Well the sheriff caught wind that Amos
Was in the swamp huntin' alligator skins
So he snuck in the swamp, gonna getcha boy,
But he never come out again.
Well, I wonder where the Louisiana sheriff went to?
You can sure get lost in a Louisiana bayou!
About 45 minutes southeast of Thibodeaux, Louisiana
Lived a man named Doc Milsap and his pretty wife Hanna
They raised a son who could eat up his weight in groceries,
Named him after a man of the cloth,
Called him Amos Moses
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