SONG OF THE DAY SUPER SPECIAL

SONGS ABOUT BEING COLDER THAN POOP

Metallica - "Trapped Under Ice"

I don't know how to live trough this hell
Woken up, I'm still locked in this shell
Frozen soul, frozen down to the core
Break the ice, I can't take anymore

Freezing
Can't move at all
Screaming
Can't hear my call
I am dying to live
Cry out
I'm trapped under the ice

Crystallized, as I lay here and rest
Eyes of glass stare directly at death
From deep sleep I have broken away
No one knows, no one hears what I say

Freezing
Can't move at all
Screaming
Can't hear my call
I am dying to live
Cry out
I'm trapped under the ice

Scream from my soul
Fate, mystified
Hell, forever more
No release from my cryonic state
What is this? I've been stricken by fate
Wrapped up tight, cannot move, can't break free
Hand of doom has a tight grip on me

Freezing
Can't move at all
Screaming
Can't hear my call
I am dying to live
Cry out
I'm trapped under the ice

Mastodon - "Siberian Divide"

Ice god shakes the earth
Destruction of the path
Sinking deeper in the snow
Eating bark with blackened hands
Swollen fingers frozen jaw
Warm teeth wrapped around my wrist
Frostbite eating away at our limbs
Slit the belly brontotherium
Climb towards vermillion snowbank fall
Station of the crosses prayer save all
Chewing bone
Euphoria
Land and sky
Shining skull
Ice field blanket land
Hunted beyond the fray
No direction known
Running with the band
Provisions wearing thin
Avalanche sweeps the land
Starvation setting in
Spilling all that's left
Should've kept the fruits from virgin's vine
Three-horned face
Pillar of red
Evil lives atop my crooked spine
Rosebush current flow
Carmine river go
Solar storms erupt on the sun
Ice fields blanket land
Snow queen
Hypothermia
Ice lips
Hallucination
Ice field blanket land
Hunted beyond the fray
No direction known
Running with the band
Provisions wearing thin
Avalanche sweeps the land
Landscape ebb 'n' flow
Think I felt the end of time
Skulls aglow as crystal shines
And starts to warm the empty climb

Iron Maiden - "Stranger in a Strange Land"

Was many years ago that I left home and came this way
I was a young man, full of hope and dreams
But now it seems to me that all is lost and
nothing gained
Sometimes things ain't what they seem
No brave new world, no brave new world
No brave new world, no brave new world

Night and day I scan horizon, sea and sky
My spirit wanders endlessly
Until the day will dawn and friends from home
discover why
Hear me calling, rescue me
Set me free, set me free
Lost in this place, and leave no trace

Stranger in a strange land
Land of ice and snow
Trapped inside this prison
Lost and far from home

One hundred years have gone and men again
they came that way
To find the answer to the mystery
They found his body lying where it fell that day
Preserved in time for all to see
No brave new world, no brave new world
Lost in this place, to leave no trace

What became of the man that started
All are gone and their souls departed
Left me here in this place
So all alone

Stranger in a strange land
Land of ice and snow
Trapped inside this prison
Lost and far from home

What became of the man that started
All are gone and their souls departed
Left me here in this place
So all alone

Stranger in a strange land
Land of ice and snow
Trapped inside this prison
Lost and far from home

Voivod - "Polaroids"

Hostile white
Blizzard's rage
Crystallized
Frosted Face
The sore shoulders
The weight of days
Haw far to go
In desert snow

Where the wind takes our dreams
Where the scene is unreal

Across the iceland
Enduring fate
The hills of sickness
The cliff of fear
Months of darkness
The loss of time
Only a limelight
Flows in the sky
And every morning
Buried in place
Zombies awaking
And keep the pace
There is no crossroad
Nor choice to make
It's always further
Always ahead

Where the wind steals our dreams
Where yourself is revealed

Hey !

Turning in circles
Our worst nightmare
No more supplies
Nor food to share
All the strength
I've left behind
Would be useful
Now that I die
It doesn't matter
Not anymore
Only a limelight
Flows in the sky
Glows in the sky

Where the wind takes our dreams
Where the scene is surreal
Where the wind steals our dreams
Where yourself is revealed

Who wants to land
On no-man's land?
Who wants to end
On Morgoth land?

And oh man

This is the least-burnt bag of popcorn, ever.

Man, for right now at least

Diet Cherry 7Up is like the greatest thing, ever.

Also, fuck Rex Grossman.

CHICAGO BEAR OF THE DAY

BOB THOMAS

SONG OF THE DAY

Iron Maiden - "Rime of the Ancient Mariner"

Hear the rime of the Ancient Mariner
See his eye as he stops one of three
Mesmerizes one of the wedding guests
Stay here and listen to the nightmares
of the Sea

And the music plays on, as the bride passes by
Caught by his spell and
the Mariner tells his tale.

Driven south to the land of the snow and ice
To a place where nobody's been
Through the snow fog flies on the albatross
Hailed in God's name,
hoping good luck it brings.

And the ship sails on, back to the North
Through the fog and ice and
the albatross follows on

The mariner kills the bird of good omen
His shipmates cry against what he's done
But when the fog clears, they justify him
And make themselves a part of the crime.

Sailing on and on and North across the sea
Sailing on and on and North 'till all is calm

The albatross begins with its vengeance
A terrible curse a thirst has begun
His shipmates blame bad luck on the Mariner
About his neck, the dead bird is hung.

And the curse goes on and on at sea
And the curse goes on and on for them and me.

"Day after day, day after day,
we stuck nor breath nor motion
As idle as a painted ship upon a painted ocean
Water, water everywhere and
all the boards did shrink
Water, water everywhere nor any drop to drink."

[SAMUEL TAYLOR COLERIDGE (1798-1834)]

There, calls the mariner
there comes a ship over the line
But how can she sail with no wind
in her sails and no tide.

See... onward she comes
Onwards she nears, out of the sun
See... she has no crew
She has no life, wait but there's two

Death and she Life in Death,
they throw their dice for the crew
She wins the Mariner and he belongs to her now.
Then ... crew one by one
They drop down dead, two hundred men
She... She, Life in Death.
She lets him live, her chosen one.

[NARRATIVE]
"One after one by the star dogged moon,
too quick for groan or sigh
Each turned his face with a ghastly pang
and cursed me with his eye
Four times fifty living men
(and I heard nor sigh nor groan),
With heavy thump, a lifeless lump,
they dropped down one by one."

[SAMUEL TAYLOR COLERIDGE (1798-1834)]

The curse it lives on in their eyes
The Mariner he wished he'd die
Along with the sea creatures
But they lived on, so did he.

And by the light of moon
He prays for their beauty not doom
With heart he blesses them
God's creatures all of them too.

Then the spell starts to break
The albatross falls from his neck
Sinks down like lead into the Sea
Then down in falls comes the rain.

Hear the groans of the long dead seamen
See them stir and they start to rise
Bodies lifted by good spirits
None of them speak
and they're lifeless in their eyes

And revenge is still sought, penance starts again
Cast into a trance and the nightmare carries on.

Now the curse is finally lifted
And the Mariner sights his home
Spirits go from the long dead bodies
Form their own light and
the Mariner's left alone

And then a boat came sailing towards him
It was a joy he could not believe
The Pilot's boat, his son and the hermit
Penance of life will fall onto Him.

And the ship it sinks like lead into the sea
And the hermit shrieves the mariner of his sins

The Mariner's bound to tell of his story
To tell his tale wherever he goes
To teach God's word by his own example
That we must love all things that God made.

And the wedding guest's a sad and wiser man
And the tale goes on and on and on.

CHICAGO BEAR OF THE DAY

WENDELL DAVIS

two things i am not thankful for

1. Realizing that I have no butter, which kicks ass on pumpkin bread.
2. Realizing that I still don't own a single Tommie Harris trading card.

Two things I am thankful for

1. Deciding to take a peek into the Thanksgiving leftovers they sent me home with and seeing that I got hooked up with a FAT SACK OF PUMPKIN BREAD.
2. Topps's Bowman division, and their wild-eyed, crazy obsession with rookie cards.

Dead Guppies aren't much fun.

Now, I'm down to just the Plecostomus That Wouldn't Die. Stupid fish. Gonna change out about four more gallons of water today, and just let things sit empty for a while until I can buy more water and finish the total water changing process around Friday or so. And while I've always liked them, I'm giving up on putting guppies in there. I've already killed five, and that's more than I need on my conscience. If the algae eater decides to die in the meantime, I might just ditch the heater and go with goldfish, since those are also hard to kill, and new ones go for like a quarter.

Stupid fish. I should just have a tank with nothing but algae eaters and plants. Or maybe some snails.

CHICAGO BEAR OF THE DAY

Doing a lot of these lately...

CEDRIC BENSON (2006 EDITION)

CHICAGO BEAR OF THE DAY

DAN HAMPTON

Goddammit.

I think I'm about to give up on this fish tank thing. Kellen Winslow Jr. bit the dust this morning, and the dalmatian molly followed suit sometime between lunch and me getting home today, and the black molly won't eat or swim in any direction, even if you tap on the glass right next to him, meaning he's probably got a few hours left. The yellow guppy and the algae eater show no signs of any trouble right now, but aside from the black guppy with the mangled tail, neither did any of the other fish I keep killing. With hindsight, I should have just gone with the gangsta-ass Oscar tank, because that way, all the fish would still die, but they'd be going out fighting, instead of just floating.
Keeping fish might be the most depressing and infuriating hobby there is, outside of being a Chicago Bears fan.

r.i.p. black guppy

Bummer, dude. Not sure if I'm gonna go back to PetSmart for a replacement any time soon, but whenever I do go back there, I'm making sure the bitch that butchered his tail and eventually killed him isn't the one who scoops my fish out this time.

Return to the sea, little friend. *FLUSH*

current status

I'm worried about the black guppy. His tail fins got all screwed up somewhere between getting scooped out of the tank at PetSmart and getting dumped out of the bag here, and they seem to look worse every time I check him out. Also, he's just kind of hovering in one spot at the top of the tank most of the time, which is also kind of scary. He is eating though, which is never a bad thing. Everybody else is pretty much kicking ass at not dying, on a more positive note, and the hungry-ass dalmatian molly has cleaned up all the algae disks that the plecostomus won't eat.

CHICAGO BEAR OF THE DAY

DWAYNE SLAY

current status

Added four more fish; a black molly, a dalmatian molly, and a couple more guppies, black and yellow. Decided to feed everybody, and all the new fish ate like crazy. K2 seemed horrified at the entire occurrence, hovering in the back corner and not eating, until the yellow swam up and they were all "aw yeah, you my nigga" and they're all schooling together now. The tank seems pretty segregated, though, with the mollies hanging out on the right and the guppies on the left, with the dalmatian molly running over there and scattering guppies every so often. The mollies appear to be way more gangsta than the guppies, which is troubling, since a molly is like the size of four guppies put together, but they aren't even semi-aggressive, so it should work out okay. Meanwhile, the rubber-lipped plecostomus remains unaffected by the festivites, and is still stuck to the back glass. Hopefully, everybody makes it this time, but I've put in about four gallons of the store-bought good water, so I remain hopeful. The black guppy did get his tail fins all screwed up somewhere in transit, but he did seem to be the hungriest and most active of the three in there, so things look good for now. Stay tuned for further details.

oh man i need this card

Leon Washington thinks you're Number one. So much so that he had to tell you with both hands.

CURRENT STATUS

More than likely due to the ill-advised decision to use tap water and various chemicals, rather than the fancy store-bought stuff from downtown, I'm now down to one guppy. As such, I have decided to go against my normal policy of not giving fish names, (Because man, what if you use up a good name you could have given to a cat or something?) and he will now be known as "Kellen Winslow, Jr.", because he is clearly a fucking soldier. The algae-eater remains as well, but those hit a point where the only way to kill them is with hammers or fire, so he gets no such special treatment for now. Anyway, I bought the good water, and scooped out a little over a gallon of the old stuff, which is something I'll probably do on at least a daily basis for a while. Tomorrow (or later today) I might go to Petsmart to get more fish, because the way K2 swims up and down looking at his reflection in the wall as thought it was another fish is starting to depress me. Also, I got some new fake plants.

"You don't know what I'm up against."

Orson Welles rules. "This is a lot of shit, you know that."

These Charmin Freshmates...

It's like the comfort and superior cleaning power of wiping your butt with a wet washcloth, but without the embarrassing inconvenience of having poopy rags laying everywhere.

Ooh, that's not good...

Got the Transformers the Movie special 20th anniversary edition DVD yesterday, and while the special features are awesome and totally made it worthwhile, there's a huge problem with the whole "widescreen for the first time in 20 years" thing. Check it out:
Full-screen version from disk two:

Widescreen version from disk one:

Notice anything missing? Like perhaps the TOP AND BOTTOM OF THE SCREEN?
Also, the "color correction" job they did on the super-enhanced widescreen version mainly just brightened everything and turned Hot Rod pink. D'oh.
But there's two commentary tracks, so it's all good.

Current Status

Started small on fish tank; three random guppies and a rubber-lipped plecostomus. Plecostomus darted and hid behind heater, possible bad sign; guppies saw floating food and munched like no other, possible good sign. Water temperature approx. 78 degrees.

I know I could have gone big time and gotten some gangsta-ass Oscars or something, but I'm really into peace and harmony amongst fish, so I went with guppies. I'll let those guys flutter around for a while, and if the tank proves survivable, I'll go get some neons or those little frogs something, or possibly a betta, since their brains only fill up with murder when other bettas are around. I thought about those pink kissing fish, but my brother's is like the size of something you could totally eat now, and it's only a ten gallon tank, so that may not be wise. Also, I need more plants and something for nocturnal stuff like the algae eater to hide under.

A work in progress

Coming soon: FISH!

i'm not feeling so good about the bears anymore

It's becoming more and more apparent to me that this team is a 7-9 team that's just had an insanely easy schedule. Things started great, but despite the 7-1 record, the only way they're making the playoffs is because everyone else in the NFC North would be lucky to win 6 games. Stan Grossman's evil twin Rex is back in at quarterback, which means they're back to having a sub-50% passer who crumbles at the slightest suggestion of a hint of pressure, the running game never even got going when they were everyone's pick to have an undefeated season, the defense gives up yards and points like crazy as of late while forgetting how to sack the quarterback, Tommie Harris and Bernard Berrian have all but disappeared, and rookie superstar Devin Hester can't hold on to the ball and has no idea when to just let the punt bounce. Simply put, this is the only team I've ever seen put up 41 points on a bad team and not look very good at all while doing it.
The funny part is that after a way-pessimistic look down the rest of their schedule, they'll still probably go 11-5, at least.

FIRE! WATER! WATER PUTS OUT FIRE!

ACTIVATE THEIR BATTLE BADGES!

My hands are so dry...

That when I put lotion on them, it BURNS.

my insulation is crazy

It's been all cold today, but it always seems to stay a comfortable room temperature in here. But tonight, it finally got a little chilly, so I flipped on my little $19 electric heater and let it run on low while I was in the shower. It is totally warm in here now. Wow. Also, my electric bill this month was like fifty bucks.