Man, Ebay

I've been spending too much money on football cards (I'll post more about that tomorrow, when I'm not about to pass out) in the last year, and while the relatively high-dollar cards (for me, at least; I'm one one of the creepy power-collectors who spends the hundreds every month on the stuff required to get the severely valuable stuff) of guys who aren't my favorite players (the "notebook guys;" more on that at a later date) have piled up, it occurred to me that I really ought to try selling some of these off to try and make the 20-year addiction start to pay for itself. But a quick scan across Ebay has shown me that they might not be the way to go to dump off the stack of Vince Youngs and Matt Leinarts that have accumulated. Like I got this card. A Charlie Whitehurst card. And yeah, he's a backup QB and his stuff isn't in high demand, but it's one of those cards that has a chunk of a jersey attached to it. A real jersey that he's even wearing on the front of the card. Everybody wants those jersey cards right now, you know? And the thing books at about six bucks or so, and I figure hell, I might be able to make at least half of that. Well, taking a quick glance across the Whitehurst stuff other people have put up for auction, the picture is freaking grim. It's like a vast sea of jersey cards, autographed cards, and autographed jersey cards, all of which book at way more than the one I have, and they're all going for like a dollar ninety-nine, if anyone's bid at all. And the thing is, it's the same way for cards of guys who people actually want cards of, who aren't scrubs like Charlie fucking Whitehurst. What I want to know is where all these low-bid cards are when it's actually one I would want? How can a Reggie Bush card with authentic autographs from Reggie Bush, Jesus Christ, and The Easter Bunny with a book value of nine-zillion dollars auction for $8.00, when the $3.50 autographed Jim Flanigan card I tried to get once zoomed up to $11.50 by the time I decided that only a retard would pay that much for a card of a lesser-known defensive tackle?

I think what I'm trying to say here is that if there's anyone out there who likes football cards with pieces of jerseys glued to them, I got some Matt Jones, Charlie Whitehurst, Derrick Hagan, and Willis McGahee action I can hook you up with. (For the record, I've also got ones with Olin Kreutz, Anquan Boldin, and Charlie Batch, but I'm keeping those for me.) Also, I think I have like four of that Topps Total Sports Illustrated for Kids Reggie Bush that's worth like eight bucks, but I can't remember where the box is with all of those, so just focus on the jersey cards for now. But yeah, you guys should send me money for those.