And for the final Halloween content

What a nightmare! Who were those guys?

also, thanks to the remnants of my halloween costume

My Tick poster has got THAT MUSTACHE FEELING.

happy halloween, bang bang

oh man oh man oh man

I just came this close to brushing my teeth with generic Ben Gay.

I was gonna wear a halloween costume to work today

But then I realized how bad it would suck to unload pallets of freight while wearing some uncomfortable crap. Think I'll go normal first, then change when I come home for lunch.

Well, cleaned the apartment

Not like totally clean, but at least it's somewhat presentable now. The problem now is that all the dust is stirred up, and I can't stop sneezing. Think I'm gonna go look for an air filter thingy of some sort. I wonder if I have any of those Bed, Bath, & Beyond 20% off coupons anywhere. Also, I'm seriously considering dropping some money on a new bean bag chair and possibly some sort of small (like five gallon) fish tank. Another odd thing is that I did some desk rearranging, since I'm trying to turn all my stuff that's only available on cassette into CDs. So now, I have this desk with a 19 inch LCD flat-panel monitor, a few spindles of things like DVD-R and LightScribe CDR disks, a computer with a 3.0 GHz Pentium 4 processor, and a nearly thirty year old cassette deck. I don't know, there's just something I really like about that.

"HEY MAN, IS THAT FREEDOM ROCK?"

"YEAH, MAN!"
"WELL TURN IT UP, MAN!"

Meanwhile...

Got my jacket back, (the part of me that still has faith in humanity thinks someone grabbed it by mistake yesterday and brought it back, but my brain tells me someone stole it and was stupid enough to wear it to work today and leave it on the same coat rack they stole it from) and I might be getting hooked up with a new job that starts out at like a buck more an hour, and could be as much as 30% less soul-draining than Wal Mart. Also, Bully is awesome.

Good times.

seriously, though, let me put it this way:

Saturday, I got so fed up with work that the only reason I even came back after going home for my lunch break was because I had left my jacket hanging back by the break room. And well, after today's events, THE FUCKING THING ISN'T THERE ANYMORE, IS IT?

I'm totally need to get some kerosene and burn that place down. Argh.

open letter to the guy who stole my jacket off the coat rack at work today

FUCK YOU IN THE ASS.

TAKE A LOOK, IT'S IN A BOOK...

I get bored sometimes.

FAT SALE?

So here's the deal. I'm like 60 pounds lighter than I was earlier in the year, and I can't wear XXL shirts anymore. So if there's any lardos out there who want any of this stuff, drop a comment or something, and maybe something can be worked out, be it through money being exchanged or some sort of trade of other crap. I'm not saying all of this is definitely for sale; I'm just kind of throwing this out there to see if there's any interest. Here's the stuff I can think of off the top of my head, and there might be more:
- An assortment of plain t-shirts. Some new, some old, a couple ringers, maybe a solid color or two. Think I paid like 5 bucks apiece for most of this stuff.
- One Mastodon T-shirt. The "In Search of / Est. 2000" Bigfoot design. Worn a few times, but still pretty good shape. (I think I got it in like January)
- One Anthrax T-shirt. State of Euphoria album cover. Not really worn that much. Almost new. (Got it the same time as the Mastodon shirt.)
- One Marcus Robinson Chicago Bears home replica jersey. Fit huge even when I was still huge, so keep that in mind. Also, it's only been worn maybe five times (because it was too big for me) and cost like $75 when it was new, so if you want this, it's gonna cost you.

Well?

Hey, new blog thingy

Basically, I noticed that I have a whole crapload of CDs. Some I haven't listened to in a long time, and a few that I've barely listened to at all. So I decided to make a way to force myself to listen to all of them, one-by-one, with my thoughts on all of it shared with you, the seven or eight people who stop by this place from time to time. And I know I'm far from a professional music reviewer or even a half-decent amateur music reviewer, but I'll do my best to make this thing have some amount of quality. Perhaps even RESTAURANT QUALITY.

THE CONVERSION PROJECT #2

Hey, last time around I got a record player, so I could finally play records. This time, I spent 35 bucks on an old tape deck, so I could listen to tapes without them sounding like utter poop. Pretty decent one, too. It's almost as old as I am, but it's in good shape, as far as I can tell. It's an old Technics deck from all the way in 81 or so, back before dual cassette, and when tape decks had two microphone inputs and you could hear squealy crap when you rewound or fast-forwarded a certain way. It's not like a zillion-dollar Nakamichi or anything, but hey, it cost someone 200 bucks when I was a year old.
Anywho, I got this one tape a while back from Bobby, one of my old internet homeys who promotes shows down in the New Orleans area, in addition to being master and commander of the good ol' fashioned paper (and in the internet age, that means something) 'zine Paranoize. Anyway, the main things on this particular mixed tape were the albums Innocents by Only Living Witness and Watch it Burn by Cast Iron Hike, and there were also a few songs on the end of side two by some other band I had never heard of. And while the stuff by the other band was pretty awesome, the other stuff on there (particularly Innocents) was like totally awesome, and the extra stuff tacked on at the end kind of got lost in the shuffle as I wore out the tape with what are now two of my favorite records of all time on it while piddling around in my mom's 1993 Ford Tempo. But now, fast-forward to a few days ago. I had decided to pick up a copy of Mastodon's 2005 The Workhorse Chronicles DVD, since they're pretty much my favorite band on Earth at the moment and I had some weird Jones going for anything Mastodon-based. But anyway, Troy Sanders is all talking about the stuff they did before they were Mastodon, and damned if he doesn't mention that he and Brent Hinds had been in Four Hour Fogger. Holy crap, they were the kind of awesome band that I had forgotten about, because Only Living Witness was so totally awesome. I HAVE THEM ON TAPE. So now, here we are, with three and a half songs of theirs. I have no idea when these were recorded or where they came from. They might be demos, there might have been a Cd made, there could have been some vinyl pressed. I just don't know. Aside from the fact that Mastodon's bass and guitar players/dual frontmen were in the band, there seems to be absolutely no information about them on the internet anywhere, and I'm too lazy to go hunt Bobby down and ask. All I do know is that this stuff rocks, except for the fourth song, which would have rocked if the tape hadn't run out. Here you go. (And since this is only a few minutes of stuff, the Jerry Clower album I converted a little while back is still available for download)
POSSIBLY RANDOM FOUR HOUR FOGGER STUFF:
1. Triracial Isolates
2. Victim Eyes
3. Test of Toast
4. (some of) Pita Bread

hahahahahahaha

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1h71vEQtCM

i just had like seven heart attacks

AND IF I HAD TO BE GAY WITH A MAN, IT WOULD BE DEVIN HESTER.

YAY FOOTBALL.

stupid bears

Seriously.

hey, dvd collection

R U JEALOUSE??

oh man

I think one of my neighbors is listening to "(Anesthesia) Pulling Teeth." Or at least that's what the faint hum through the walls sounds like. Actually, it sounded like someone from upstairs was trying to saw through the floor/ceiling into my apartment earlier, so I hope my through-the-wall noise assessments are incorrect.

My utopian vision.

51% of Americans don't believe in evolution. 36% suspect that 9/11 was a government conspiracy. I bet if we killed that 87% of the population off, we'd have a totally kick-ass country.

With lots of room to move around.

So yeah, I just spent like almost fifty bucks on DVDs.

But now, I have like every Nightmare on Elm Street movie ever. Except Freddy vs. Jason. But still, it's not like that one's going to be out of print any time soon. It will come in due time. But yeah, the new super-special Infinifilm version of the first one, with special features and stuff just came out, and the rest were on sale for $4.88 apiece. What was I to do?

Also, like a week ago, I decided to drop five bucks on a used copy of No More Tears by Ozzy Osbourne, because it just seemed odd that I didn't have it already. And all it did was serve to remind me that there might as well only be one song on there, because the rest of the CD isn't very good. And don't mention "Mama, I'm Coming Home" to me, because I can't be bothered with boring lighter-in-the-air ballads for Sharon Osbourne. Oh well. Totally should have gotten the $5 used copy of The Ultimate Sin instead. Because it's a shot in the daaaaaark, ooooone steeeeepp awaaaayyy from yooooooouuuuu. Yeah.

But while I'm typing, here is a more-than-likely-incomplete short list of songs about Freddy Krueger, in some attempt at chronological order:

S.O.D. - "Man of Your Dreams"
Hirax - "Raging Violence"
M.O.D. - "Freddy Krueger"
Dokken - "Dream Warriors"
Sacred Reich - "Man of Your Dreams"
Fishbone - "Freddy's Dead" (honestly, this one's not really about Freddy at all, but it's the title track for a Nightmare on Elm Street movie soundtrack, so that counts, dammit)

Are there any I've left out?

OH MAN KANGAROOS

So I read the new Achewood today, and it got me all nostalgic to Google Kangaroo sneakers, and HOLY CRAP SOMEONE DECIDED TO BRING BACK KANGAROOS. WALTER PAYTON WORE THOSE. But they're like sixty-five bucks a pair, and that seems a bit much for what appears to be the kind of shoe Reebok and Adidas sell for like thirty bucks less, but with a pocket on the side. But still, POCKETS FOR YOUR KEYS AND CHANGE.

Well, it's official

February: 293 lbs.
This morning: 233 lbs.

At this pace, I might not be a fatass in a few more months.

IF YOUR LOCAL GROCERY STORE HAS HONEYCRISP APPLES

BUY THEM. OH MAN.